I am not having a good day to say the least.
I woke up and was ready to start my day off right. I wanted a good breakfast, but I find that there is no milk and the toaster is broken. Instantly, I was put in a bad mood. I was getting all of my internet things done like I always do and people kept sending me things and I got way off track.
I did nothing for exercise. I started a few times but certain things just piss me off. Let's go through this more:
I wanted to watch my TV show and do some ab exercises, but the floor in the living room is repulsive. I was going to vacuum up, but my mom was taking a nap. Instantly annoyed and felt so trapped--AGAIN! Ugh. So, I decided I would go outside and run around in the yard. Turns out, my idiot brother hasn't mowed the lawn. I cannot deal with his laziness. It just makes me really really angry. He is a free-loader, for sure. I know, I'm old enough to move out and all that too, but unlike my brother, I go to school full-time and I help around the house. It really does annoy me how my brother seems to ruin everything. Seriously, everything.
Anyway. I got so annoyed outside. I came inside and told my mom that she needs to tell my brother to mow the lawn. I do that a lot; tell my parents what they need to do. She either didn't tell him, or he ignored her. So I might just do that tomorrow myself, even though I've never mowed the lawn. It can't be too hard, right? We had a decent sized yard, so it should be a good work out.
Also while I was outside, there is this stray cat my mom feeds (in bowls that I bought for the house) and she (the cat) would not leave me alone. So I dumped out her food and water bowls, took them inside and washed them. I told my mom she is NOT allowed to use MY bowls for the animals anymore. I also took the bowl we've been using for our inside cats and used a different dish for them. My parents can buy them real pet dishes. They can get them from the Dollar Tree for $1, so they should do that instead of ruining the bowls that I bought for the house. I'm tired of having to wash the bowl I used for breakfast so I can have one for lunch. It is ridiculous. Let's not even mention how more than half of the dishes I've bought are missing - oops, I mentioned it.
I did some dishes and started dinner. The stove top isn't working properly for some reason. Our landlords need to buy a new stove. I wish we could use the stove we own! It is just getting ruined in the garage. My brother (useless, isn't he?) put it in a spot that leaked - so it's been getting soaked when it rains. Great. The reason we don't have it in the kitchen is... it doesn't fit. Our kitchen is crazy small and the oven door would literally not open if we were to install it.
I'm ranting, and I don't care!
So I'm trying to make dinner with one working burner. Awesome. I am still in the process of cooking dinner as I type.
I sometimes feel like I cannot do this. I cannot lose any weight. I'm way too stressed out from every day life to add this stress too. Then I remember how I just need to kick myself in the ass and do it. This is for ME. Everyone else is second. I come first.
Maybe after dinner I'll take a long walk - even though I hate walking by myself. I also hate walking with other people. I want to go at MY pace, ya know?
I feel like the world is against me and I just want to punch the world in the face, until the message is clear: I'm going to do this.
Sweat. Blood. Tears. Just do it.
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